Living Through Stage IV Brain Cancer in a Loved One

Upon hearing that his stepmother has Stage IV brain cancer, a young man bares his soul out of love for her in a unique and powerful composition..

Dear Kegan. by Kegan Quimby

Greg, Kegan, Alden with Lorraine

         
Click here.  



image - https://medium.com/@keganquimby/dear-kegan-a0448c5da68a 

We [two single people] Had Sex. Now What?

I like this article below. It acknowledges our shortcomings and helps us to renew our faith!

So many other articles talk about how to strengthen yourself from ever falling short of the Catholic mark. It is all good information, but the reality is that people do fall short - and then struggle with how to recoup. This article helps.

https://www.catholicmatch.com/institute/2017/05/we-had-sex-now-what/



image - http://blog.seekingmillionaire.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/too-picky-when-dating.png

8 Things Every Catholic Should Be Doing Every Day - #4, Tell someone you love them and why

4. Tell someone you love them and why

When I was growing up, my parents were in emotional survival mode. I don't recall one time when either of them told me or any of my five siblings that they loved us. Nor do I remember a time when they shared such sentiments with each other.

On the other hand, my five brothers and sisters and I started telling and showing our children, "I love you," very early on in their lives. We still do it 27+ years later. Our children are happier and relatively more self-assured. I would not attribute that solely to our expressing our love for them, but I believe that was/is a significant part of it. Once you start saying it (and showing it through acts of kindness and love), it fosters a more loving environment than the one created without it. No science; no psychology; no religion. Pretty much speculation, but it's speculation based on a mother's heart, and sometimes that is more reliable than any of the rest.

Every day. Tell someone every day that you love them and why. The why could be because the child is a gift from God and how can any of us not love a gift from God?

image -http://in2.ccio.co/k3/IE/NF/4105dece39d7f1a69d5235da51dd70e4.jpg

2. Smile, Use your manners, Be kind, Give out hugs.

Continuing along with  8 Things Every Catholic Should Be Doing Every Day, we're onto #2 in the list, which boils down to...Drum roll please....

♪♫   R-E-S-P-E-C-T   ♪♫

2. Smile, Use your manners, Be kind, Give out hugs

Basic social etiquette is called for here, and a little more to show the people in our lives that we love them.  They are simple, but have a powerful effect, both in the short run and in the long run. They are simple, but they are not as prevalent (me included) as we need them to be.

I was reading a piece the other day about my home town. The author was pining for the good ole' days when children respected their parents and did things like those suggested above. How did it turn for the worse? Maybe it occurred when adults stopped giving each other a simple cordial smile upon passing, when they stopped paying attention to having good manners, even for themselves, and stopped being kind and giving out warm and appropriate hugs.

Basically, the world got grumpy. I cannot tell you how many people I pass on the sidewalk, in the halls, and at church who cast their gaze down and say not a word as we pass - until they hear me say hello. Many, but not all, will often reply in kind. 99% are not initiators, however.

I play a game with it now. "Ok, Let's see what this person is going to do..." Inevitably, I am disappointed. Once I overcome that feeling, I ask God to bless us both.

We really need to make a lot of effort if we want to make our lives more pleasant and meaningful, i.e., if we want to get to heaven.

What Are Some Basic Manners?
- Smile when you see another person.
- Say, "Please."
- Say, "Thank you."
- Say, "I beg your pardon."
- Hug your mother and your father as a child and as an adult.
- Open the door for others.
- Help the elderly cross the street.
- Let others, especially pregnant woman, have the last seat on the metro.
- Ask before you borrow someone else's property.
- Let your cell phone or smart phone go to voicemail when you are talking with someone.



image - https://mcacesblogs.files.wordpress.com/2014/03/respect.jpg

Excerpts from "What I Didn't Know When I Stopped Having Sex"

My original post was on Facebook. Thank you, Tori, for your sharing.

"What I Didn't Know When I Stopped Having Sex"

     "...No one told me that sleeping with that guy from the bar would leave me feeling more empty than I thought possible. No one told me that it would make me feel more unworthy and more alone. No one told me that with each one-night stand, my heart was building up walls that would keep everyone out. No one told me that allowing men access to my body would make it seemingly impossible to receive a hug, hear someone tell me that I ambeautiful, or let myself be loved."

     "I stopped having sex and you have the freedom as well...."

     "... despite what the world was telling me, I could stop having sex. I could save it for the proper context and I could regain the part of me that is so precious."

     "The battle is to claim a new life in Christ and to shed away the masks of false identity."

     "...I learned that while on His cross, the Lord saw all those lonely nights when I lay in bed wondering if this is as good as it gets. He bore the pain of my wounds and today allows me to live in the freedom which He has promised."

                                                                                             ~ Tori Vissat, Shalom Tidings, Oct/Nov 2015

To read Tori's article in its entirety, go to to the full article here.

God Bless,
Kathleen +


image - http://madeinhisimage.org/whatididntknowwhenistoppedhavingsex-2/

Mother Angelica, foundress of EWTN, dies on Easter

Mother Angelica, foundress of EWTN, dies on Easter - click here




image - http://www.catholicnewsagency.com/news/mother-angelica-founder-of-ewtn-dies-on-easter-75329/ 

Faith & Suicide Story on WBUR 90.9FM Public Radio Today

‘Everything Is Grace': Looking To Faith For Answers To Suicide 
by Lynn Jolicoeur

This is a story relating faith and suicide. It was aired this morning on WBUR 90.9FM public radio as part of the series, Suicide: A Crisis in the Shadows. You can read the transcript at the link, and you can also click on the white triangle in the blue box and listen a replay.

"Kathleen Laplante wrote a book about how her renewed Catholic faith helped her heal
from her father’s suicide and her own struggle with being suicidal. (Robin Lubbock/WBUR)"

I am honored to be included with the other people in this story. I agree with much of what they said, but I do feel the need to clarify that this is a story from different viewpoints. For example, Morning Star Baptist Church in Mattapan, Bishop John Borders, says he does not think suicide is a mortal sin. The Catholic Church still teaches that it is. I also think none of us knows anyone's final judgment, so the door to hope is left open. That means we should pray for all who have taken their lives by suicide, because God's mercy may be present. We just don't know.

Hope is one of the virtues that psychologically and spiritually brought me back to life after I was challenged with suicidal thoughts for years. It is one of the virtues that helped me recover from my own attempt at suicide several years ago. From the Catechism of the Catholic Church, we know that hope centers on eternity:

Catechism of the Catholic Church
1817 Hope is the theological virtue by which we desire the kingdom of heaven and eternal life as our happiness, placing our trust in Christ's promises and relying not on our own strength, but on the help of the grace of the Holy Spirit. "Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for he who promised is faithful." "The Holy Spirit . . . he poured out upon us richly through Jesus Christ our Savior, so that we might be justified by his grace and become heirs in hope of eternal life." - http://www.vatican.va/archive/ccc_css/archive/catechism/p3s1c1a7.htm

I am grateful to Lynn Jolicoeur for inviting me to participate in her ongoing series, Suicide: A Crisis in the Shadows. Her perseverance is bringing the different facets of suicide, and the challenges facing survivors who remain behind after a suicide, into new light.



image - http://commonhealth.wbur.org/2015/10/faith-religion-suicide
http://thechildrenarewaiting.org/wp-content/uploads/2012/10/Hope-is-an-anchor.jpg

Spread the Good News

I have seen a string of articles and blog entries with a positive spin.  It's been refreshing because not too long ago, it seemed like all there was was bad news.  Here are some of the articles I have read lately.  Enjoy!

1) I Am in the Same Week of Pregnancy as My Birthmom, Who Tried to Abort Me  

2) Act of forgiveness: Mom hugs daughter's killer in court

3) Pro-Life Miss USA Contestant Was Conceived in Brutal Rape, Glad She Wasn't Aborted

4) Seven Famous People Who Were Almost Aborted

5) H.S. Salutatorian Defies School Administration, Speaks of His Christian Faith  

6) Supreme Court Rules Pro-Life Group Can Defend Its Free Speech Rights

7) Abortion Survivor Finds Doctor Who Aborted Her Twin Brother – You Won’t Believe What Happened

Let's end with a quote from Saint John Chrysostom:
"Your children will always be sufficiently wealthy if they receive from you a good upbringing that is able to order their moral life and behavior.  Thus, strive not to make them rich, but rather to make them pious masters of their passions - rich in virtues."


image - http://www.upbeatcontemporarychoir.com/resources/upbeat%20logo.JPG

Putting WWJD To Work

 The other day, my neighbor, who lives on the second floor of our apartment building, complained about the noise my sons and I were making from our third floor apartment.  My mind started going, and I do not mean in the right direction.

"Who does she think she is?  She just moved in and she is already complaining."
"Of course she is complaining.  She doesn't have any children."
"I told her she should think about moving her bedroom [which is where she hears most of the noise].  Too bad.  She doesn't want to listen to me, then she just has to put up with the noise."

Those were some of my thoughts, which were not very charitable.  

We are like two sisters fighting, except that we are a bit older.  I began to short circuit my selfish and destructive thoughts with more considerate and constructive thoughts.  WWJD?  What would Jesus do?  I asked myself that until ideas came.  In my mind, I didn't put Jesus in my place and try to envision how He would handle things.  Instead, I brought Jesus in as a mediator [no coincidence, I'm sure] helping both of us.  

He would probably be a calming presence and try to get us to meet and talk about this in person.  Right now, all communication is done through notes she leaves at my doorstep and banging on the wall and yelling through the floor up to me in my apartment.  Thankfully, I have not yelled back down at her and I have not even thought of doing so - until today, that is.  "Oh, Jesus, please give me the strength and the courage and the will to redirect my selfish inclinations and do the right thing when so many bones in my body want to do damage."

Jesus would probably suggest we both air out our frustrations, just to vent and get them out there.  Then He would probably seek out solutions.  I am thinking,"I was here first.  Too bad for her.  I don't need a solution.  That's what happens when someone rents a second-floor apartment.  She should have know that.  She is just going to have to live with it."  Yes, my mind can be so selfish and so immature.  I am sure she is having the same party in her head.  I say that based on her note at my doorstep and her banging on the wall and yelling.

How do we break this impasse?  What would Jesus do?  So I start thinking about how He would remind us that we are not only accountable to God, but we actually love Him.  If we love Him, do we really want to stay stuck in this battle and pain Him?  Is there some way we might find some room to compromise, even in the littlest of ways?

What would Jesus do?  He would have us pray together.  Since that is not going to happen any time soon, I will continue to pray by myself.  I will pray for me and I will pray for her.

And on it goes.  I eventually felt a softness, a calm, and I could envision compromise on my part.  I had the thought that I might be able to write earlier in the day and night.  I found myself assessing my footsteps and thinking I might be able to walk a little lighter so I don't make as much noise.  And then I thought, maybe I can go down to her apartment sometime, and ask her to talk, but that one is a challenge.  I am not sure it will happen, but the fact I am even considering it is a huge step in breaking the logjam.

Only God knows how our situation will unfold in the end, but I know that with Jesus, I have a chance to handle it charitably and maturely.  WWJD?


Pax,
Kathleen


images - http://www.superiorlabels.com/LKC_Christian-Address-Labels_107_CC.htm
http://archurohi.blogspot.com/2012/03/sibling-bond.html
http://www.fotosearch.com/illustration/neighbors.html

Practicing Humility

I have struggled with practicing the virtues for a long time.  Recently, however, I have stumbled across ways to put humility into action.  I honestly think these insights came from prayer, asking God to show me His will for me and to give me the power to carry it out.  And it takes power to put humility into practice, because it hurts.  It is suffering willfully taken on for the greater glory of God.

Here is one of my experiences:

It is Thanksgiving and I have to travel an hour to be with my family.  After my son tells me his plans for that weekend, I realize it will be most convenient if I can stay overnight at my sister's house after our Thanksgiving meal.  She is the one hosting the day's event and she is the one closest in age to me.  I have stayed at her house many times with my sons.

When I ask, she says she would ordinarily say yes, but they are doing the bedrooms over and there is no furniture in the spare room.  My initial thought is to travel an hour back to my house, sleep there, and travel back up the next day to pick up my son.  Reality then sets in.  That will be two extra hours of driving, which will cost for gas and wear and tear on my car.  I am trying to save money.  Can't I do this differently?

I decide driving all the way home will be silly and maybe I should ask my other sister to stay with her.  The glitch is that I have never stayed over at my other sister's home.  I always felt like I would be intruding if I asked to stay.  My insecurities have made me believe she does not want me to stay there, and hopes I never ask her to do so.

So, I think.  What would happen if I ask her and she says yes?  "It will be too awkward.  What are we going to talk about?  We are just not in sync....etc.  Her husband will be there and he and I are hardly in sync as well.  All three of us have little in common.  We will not know what to talk about and that will be too awkward.  I can't stand it.  I'm not going to ask."  My family of origin insecurities arise.  I drop the idea.

But God doesn't.  He brings it back to me and starts me thinking about humility.  "How can I practice humility in this situation?"  I go through it in my mind.

It will be awkward when we don't have anything to talk about.  It will be awkward eating breakfast with them.  It will be awkward sleeping in the room next to them, etc.  I might be embarrassed if they bring something up that I don't want to talk about.

It finally dawns on me.  So what?  A little bit of awkwardness never killed anyone.  I can withstand that pain.  Let the ego die.  I'd save money and I would also spend time with that sister and her husband and maybe breakthrough some of our discomfort.  And if not, it would still be worth the try.  Humility comes to me.  "Just override the awkwardness.  Don't do life in a vacuum.  You are no better than your sister.  Be awkward together.  Deal with it." 

So, I do.  I ask to stay over.  My husband and my sister say yes.  I end up having some great 1-on-1 conversations with both of them.  We watch the birds together.  We pet the cats.  We have plenty of things to talk about.  I deepen my relationships and enjoy my time with them, which would happen even if the exchange was not so enjoyable.  I have learned that deepening my relationship with others does not only happen when I am in sync with others.  Part of relationships entail enduring the uncomfortable together.  Doing that deepens things as well.

Humility.  Humility does not have to be a grand effort.  Step over the smallest of your insecurities and get God's work done despite them.  Along the way, unite your sufferings to Jesus and believe you are contributing to the salvation of the world while you are willfully taking on awkwardness/pain.

Peace to all of you,
Kathleen



images - http://www.theleaderforge.com/humility-and-leadership/
http://www.saintequipper.com/pneumagrams/path-of-humility/

Canadian Woman Strangles Newborn; Walks Free

We really need it.

"An Alberta judge has let a woman who strangled her newborn son walk free by arguing that Canada’s absence of a law on abortion signals that Canadians 'sympathize' with the mother."

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“'We live in a country where there is no protection for children in the womb right up until birth and now this judge has extended the protection for the perpetrator rather than the victim, even though the child is born and as such should be protected by the court,' said Jim Hughes, national president of Campaign Life Coalition."

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This is so sad.  My heart literally aches.  As one acquaintance asked, "so when do Dads get the same power to kill?"  Read the full article here



image - http://livinghour.org/blog/progressive_christianity/justice-the-long-arc-of-the-moral-universe/

Nicki and Tyler

I just watched a refreshing video clip about a young couple, Nicki and Tyler, who talk about their discernment process regarding the nature of their relationship.  It's worth a watch.

Click here



image - http://stpatrickcatholic.org/jblum/projects/projects/

Mother Teresa's Anyway Poem

People are often unreasonable, illogical and self centered;

Forgive them anyway.

If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives;

Be kind anyway.

If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies;

Succeed anyway.

If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you;

Be honest and frank anyway.

What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight;

Build anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous;
Be happy anyway.

The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow;
Do good anyway.

Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough;
Give the world the best you've got anyway.

You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and your God;
It was never between you and them anyway.


This poem was posted on the wall at Mother Teresa's home for children in Calcutta. It is based on Kent M. Keith's poem, The Paradoxical Commandments. It really resonated with me tonight.


image - http://www.carina.cc/2011/05/20/anyway-by-mother-teresa/

God Is Good, Right?

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Did you ever pray for someone, asking God to bless them, and send them graces for their health and well-being, only to have them tell you later on, that they do not have time for you anymore?  You pray for someone else's well-being, and then you get the short end of the deal.  Yuck.

That happened to me yesterday.  Thankfully, I have enough experience to know that it is not about me, but it is about them doing God's will for them.  It hurts.  All the old ego-based thoughts come flooding forward, "Oh, yea, just wait until they see how awful their life is without me", "I hope they fall on their face", "I'm better than they are anyhow".  Not pretty.  Thank God, and I mean that literally, thank God I have the Faith. 

When I raise the situation up to His loving paradigm, I find peace.  I begin to hold on to the notion that God has good things in store for me too, that this is not just about that other person.  God is leading me to better things too.

It's just hard to hold onto that line of thinking in this mundane, weighted world.  With God though, all things are possible.  He will help me to get back on track with Him, if I give into my ego yearnings.  He will bring me to conversion, over and over again - as long as I keep talking to Him and asking Him for help.

Our Lady of Consolation, please pray for me.
Pray that He gives me the grace to be graceful in my future interactions with this person.

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image - http://kimmycute91.wordpress.com/
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Still Wondering What To Give Up For Lent?

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I often find it more challenging to do the kinds of things in the list below, than to give up ice cream or take up walking every day.  I have highlighted the three that have particular meaning and lots of room for practice for me.

A Special Lenten Fast

Give up harsh words - Use generous ones;
Give up unhappiness - Take up gratitude;
Give up anger - Take up gentleness & patience;
Give up pessimism - Take up hope and optimism;
Give up worrying - Take up trust in God;
Give up complaining - Value what you have;
Guive up stress - Take up prayer;
Give up judging others - Discover Jesus within them;
Give up sorrow and bitterness - Fill your heart with joy;
Give up selfishness - Take up compassion for others;
Give up being unforgiving - Learn reconciliation;
Give up words - Fill yourself with silence & listen to others.


May your Lenten season continue to be fruitful.  Peace. +

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images - http://crazy-frankenstein.com/page-6.html

Prayer Time

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The Roman Rite parish to which I belong is $60,000 short this year for its budget.  The prediction for next year is much greater than that, so the Pastor is asking for people to commit to more tithing.  That is probably one of the hardest jobs to do, "beg" people for money, that is.  I do not envy him.

He put out what he calls The Challenge of Generosity, which touched upon and called for the broader idea of giving.  It was mailed home to each family.  Here is an excerpt.

I pray that you will be able to respond to our increased offertory program.  This will help us sustain and increase our efforts to enrich the lives of any people.  Your simple act of giving is a start, but there are many other ways as well, such as volunteering at a hospital, working on a parish committee, doing some babysitting, or teaching a child to read.  When we support and participate in the work of the Church, we are helping to build God's Kingdom.

Please join me in praying that we will meet the Lord's challenge.

Teach us, O Lord, to understand that

generosity is shown not only by sharing with

others from what you have given to us

but also by every act of helpfulness

toward those who are in need,

and that very human being stands in need

of friendship and kindness,

understanding and encouragement.

Teach us to be generous in what we

think and say as well as in what we do.

Teach us to realize that in the

measure we give, we also receive,

and that every good thing we do brings 

a reward from you,

our most generous Lord.  Amen. 

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image - http://community412.typepad.com/uniting_to_transform_comm/2008/04/index.html

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Practicing What We Preach

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I wish we could all be every day Catholics, a matter of fact kind of thing, charity always first, Christ in everyone's hearts.  This list would be a good template to work from.  It is from Ancient and Future Catholics.  I like it.

Catholic Practices, Duties, and Common Lists

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image - http://home.catholicweb.com/our3churches/

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Simple And Effective Ways To Promote Life

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One can not truly stop doing a sin unless they practice doing a virtue in its place.  This can be paralleled to stopping abortion while simultaneously promoting life.  My previous entry covered 99 ways to stop abortion.  This entry covers ways to promote life, from the moment of conception until natural death.

- Say the rosary every day, for the born & the unborn.
- Pray for the conversion of those who support, obtain, and perform abortions.
- Abstain from sex if you are not married.
- Pray to St. Gerard to protect all expectant mothers, so they come to see how sacred life is, and so they make the only choice there is to make.
- Pray to Our Lady of Guadalupe to protect the unborn from the moment of conception until natural death.
- Think of ways you can strengthen the infrastructure to help this sect of our community at all stages of their lives, not just at birth.

- Practice chastity in your own marriage.
- Stop contracepting.  Learn about Natural Family Planning.
- Educate yourself on what it truly means to be open to God's unitive and procreative aspects of sexual relations within your marriage.
- Encourage your children to consider the priesthood.
- Learn about Theology of the Body and teach your children the glory of theirs.

- Say NO to extramarital affairs.
- Say NO to unhealthy relationships that may lead to unhealthy marriages, homes, & families.

- Thank God for your own life.

- If your neighbor could use a break from the children, offer to babysit one of them at your house, or all of them at her house.
- Think of ways to have relationship-enhancing conversations with people who support euthanasia, assisted suicide, embryonic stem cell research, the cutting back of medical services in the mental health field, partial birth abortion, and contraception. All of these are AntiLife.

- Spend uninterrupted time with your children, your parents, and your grandparents.
- Visit the elderly in nursing homes, especially your own family & friends.
- Shut off your television and cell phone at times, and ignore the ringing of the house phone. "Family First" is the motto.

- Seek out ProLife organizations in your area.  Use them as a resource and/or become a resource.

- Your own ideas: _______________


May God bless you and keep you. May He make His face shine down upon you. Amen.


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images - http://cosumnesoaksnews.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/02/Andrea-baby.jpg
http://www.dustylens.com/Old-Man-best.jpg

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Humility and Perseverance

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I am piecing together two articles for a local newspaper.  I say piecing together, because that is what it is.  It is a bit on the painstaking side, calling me to practice the virtues of humility and perseverance.

I know what I want to say, but I don't know how I want to say it.  On second thought, I don't even know what I want to say.  It keeps changing.  I am praying to the Holy Spirit for inspiration, but it is slow in coming.  My guess is that He will come forth more strongly as the deadlines approach.  That's just how He works in my life.

The topics?  They are related to women's issues.  Imagine that.  ;-)  Here is a fitting prayer to help me on my way.  It is from the Publicans Prayer Book from the Melkite Greek Catholic Church's Eparchy in West Roxbury, MA.

O Blessed Theotokos, open the portal of your
deep mercy to us who put our trust in you, so that
we may not be brought to confusion, but through
you may be delivered from adversity; for you are
 the salvation of the Christian fold.  Amen.

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From the Catechism of the Catholic Church:
1833 Virtue is a habitual and firm disposition to do good.


image - http://www.shermankuek.net/2007/12/.

Continuing With Prudence In Conversations

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Keys of Virtue

Yesterday, I became angry about someone's rude behavior.  My initial reaction was to call a friend and "vent", but other thoughts came to me.  "Wait a minute.  Do I really need to talk about this incident and talk about the person involved?  What is my motivation?  Will I just be badmouthing the person or do I really need to vent to get clarity?"

It has only been a week since I have been practicing the virtue of prudence in conversations and I see glimpses of it taking hold.  It inspires me to continue because the ultimate hope is that the practice will become a good habit.  It will become habitual and more automatic as I live my life.

So what did I do with those thoughts that surfaced?  I held on to them, as well as my intense feelings, and I went on with my day as best I could.  I did not pick up the phone and vent as I normally would have.  Instead, as my angry, vindictive thoughts arose, I just noticed them and asked myself questions again.  "Do I really need to blab about it, or can I sit with things and see if my anger will resolve itself and bring clarity?  What exactly am I mad about?  Am I mad because of the rude behavior, or am I mad because I don't like that person in the first place and this gives me a reason to show everyone else I have been right about them all along?" 

I let this unravel and eventually became calm.  I realized I didn't need to call anyone about this.

Then, lo and behold, I find myself in a conversation with another friend of mine, and I start "venting" and sharing the things that made me angry - except - it was all happening out of habit and not need.  I knew right away that what I was doing was not necessary and I felt empty with every word that came out about it.  The problem - I didn't know how to stop myself.  I did not know how to fill the conversation with other topics, so I continued blabbing even when I truly didn't care about that incident any more.  I knew in my mind right there that I was being silly, and, uncharitable toward the person with the rude behavior, as well as toward the friend I was "venting."

I wish I would have just stopped and let the awkwardness exist between me and my friend.  At least it would not have been a sin. 

Now, I am off to practice virtue.  I think I need it.  :-)

Peace in Christ,
Kathleen

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images - http://www.flickr.com/photos/keysofvirtue/87850379/
http://blog.judithpratt.info/2009/05/27/clear-writing-speaking-teaching.aspx

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