I am walking in the desert, not knowing what God wants of me right now. Or maybe it's that I know and I don't like it. After all, who likes hanging out in the desert, parched, feeling like "Be still and know that I am God" is the hardest thing in the world to live out?
I am grateful to God, though, that I tuck away papers with prayers on them everywhere in my house, often forgetting them and finding them in times like this. I just found the one below as I was doing some much needed cleaning in my office. It was on my bulletin board in a hanger I made with popsicle sticks about fifteen years ago. It's fitting for today.
"I have no idea where I am going. I do not see the road ahead of me. I cannot know for certain where it will end. Nor do I really know myself, and the fact that I think that I am following your will does not mean that I am actually doing so. But I believe that the desire to please You does, in fact, please You. And I hope I have that desire in all that I am doing. I hope that I will never do anything apart from that desire. And I know that if I do this You will lead me by the right road though I may know nothing about it. Therefore will I trust You always though I may seem to be lost and in the shadow of death. I will not fear, for You are ever with me, and You will never leave me to face my perils alone."
- Thomas Merton
image - http://www.innventia.com/upload/Edge/Product%20images/desert_web2.jpg